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Liane, Klutz Queen of the Galaxy
"The Woman Who Could Not Live With Her Faulty Heart" - Margaret Atwood

I do not mean the symbol
of love, a candy shape
to decorate cakes with,
the heart that is supposed
to belong or break;

I mean this lump of muscle
that contracts like a flayed biceps,
purple-blue, with its skin of suet,
its skin of gristle, this isolate,
this caved hermit, unshelled
turtle, this one lungful of blood,
no happy plateful.

All hearts float in their own
deep oceans of no light,
wetblack and glimmering,
their four mouths gulping like fish.
Hearts are said to pound:
this is to be expected, the heart's
regular struggle against being drowned.

But most hearts say, I want, I want,
I want, I want. My heart
is more duplicitous,
though to twin as I once thought.
It says, I want, I don't want, I
want, and then a pause.
It forces me to listen,

and at night it is the infra-red
third eye that remains open
while the other two are sleeping
but refuses to say what it has seen.

It is a constant pestering
in my ears, a caught moth, limping drum,
a child's fist beating
itself against the bedsprings:
I want, I don't want.
How can one live with such a heart?

Long ago I gave up singing
to it, it will never be satisfied or lulled.
One night I will say to it:
Heart, be still,
and it will.
 
 
Liane, Klutz Queen of the Galaxy
09 October 2010 @ 11:36 pm
Wow...an open Semagic screen. I haven't seen that in ages.

It's been awhile. I've been quiet here and in life. What have I been up to? Well...nothing, really. I've been reading books and journals. Twittering since it's easier to express my thoughts in jumping staccato bursts. Contemplating a wrist tattoo. Candle rituals. Joined Ping. Discovered Fever Ray and José González. Watched Legend of the Guardians - I love Digger. I painted my toenails black and purple the other day.

That's about it. I was going to write more, but there's just nothing to write.

Oh, except this album was definitely the right choice for tonight. It just hits the right spot.
 
 
Mood: tired
Music: Tori Amos - Lust
 
 
Liane, Klutz Queen of the Galaxy
11 September 2010 @ 10:38 am

If there is one person or more on your friends list who makes your world a better place just because they exist and who you would not have met (in real life or not) without the internet, then post this same sentence in your journal.
 
 
Liane, Klutz Queen of the Galaxy
10 September 2010 @ 09:20 am
Which returning TV show are you most excited to see again? Which shows from last season are you going to miss? Are there any new shows that look promising?
I'm excited for NCIS, but completely annoyed Miami Medical got cancelled after one season. That was one of the best shows I've seen in a long time.

 
 
Music: Broken Bells - Trap Doors | Powered by Last.fm
 
 
Liane, Klutz Queen of the Galaxy
Long time, no speak. There's a lot I've wanted to say, but I've lost the habit of writing - life has just been...

Right now, I'm listening to Charlotte Gainsbourg and getting drunk. Needless to say, it wasn't really a good day. Every single thing is getting on my last nerve, even the seemingly insignificant things. I'm hoping the alcohol will help me feel more solid and less scattered.

It goes on. I spend my time thinking and thinking and thinking.
 
 
Music: Charlotte Gainsbourg - IRM
 
 
 
Liane, Klutz Queen of the Galaxy
16 July 2010 @ 09:45 pm

Hello, I'm still alive.

I'm also burning some myrrh. Which is rather uncharacteristically biblical of me. I also have a package of frozen Ikea meatballs that I'm using as an ice pack on my arm since I injured it in a fall a few days ago. At least my return to writing isn't starting off boring...

Dark Night of the Soul officially came out on Tuesday, and while I've had a copy for awhile, I bought a deluxe version off iTunes that included some interesting media from David Lynch for each of the songs. I'd love to get the accompanying book that came out several months ago, but it's become too expensive. I've also become rather enamored with "Bones" on television. It's on in the background right now while I'm myrrhing and frozen meatballing. Wow. That sounds kinda dirty.

In other news, Nilae turned level 80 recently. That was pretty awesome.

Not much is going on really. Just thought I'd drop by to say 'hi.' I've been reading everyone's journal, I just haven't had much to say. My internet has also been wonky for the past few weeks and I've only recently gotten it back up. I'll try to make more of an effort to update from now on.

*HUGS all around*
 
 
Music: Bones
 
 
Liane, Klutz Queen of the Galaxy
13 July 2010 @ 08:51 am

I write like
Lewis Carroll

I Write Like by Mémoires, Mac journal software. Analyze your writing!


 
 
Liane, Klutz Queen of the Galaxy
24 June 2010 @ 01:23 pm
Sarah Jane Smith
Sarah Jane Smith
Take Which Doctor Who companion are you? (girls) today!
Created with Rum and Monkey's Personality Test Generator.</p>
You're Sarah Jane Smith!

The intrepid girl reporter, you invented spunky. You never rest in your relentless pursuit of what The People (and you) Want to Know, and have a profound sense of justice. You are cheerfully incapable of following orders, and have a very individualistic sense of style--much like the Doctor himself. It's no wonder you two get on so well, even if his absentmindedness makes him a bit of a handful sometimes.
 
 
Liane, Klutz Queen of the Galaxy
14 May 2010 @ 01:28 am
"Survival poem #17" by Marty McConnell

because this is what you do. get up.
blame the liquor for the heaviness. call in late
to work. go to the couch because the bed
is too empty. watch people scream about love
on Jerry Springer. count the ways
it could be worse. it could be last week
when the missing got so big
you wrote him a letter
and sent it. it could be yesterday, no work
to go to, whole day looming.
it could be last month
or the month before, when you still
thought maybe. still carried plans
around with you like talismans.
you could have kissed him last night.
could have gone home with him, given in,
cried after, softly, face to the wall, his heavy arm
around you, hand on your stomach, rubbing.
shower. remember your body. water
hotter than you can stand. sit
on the shower floor. the word
devastated ringing the tub. buildings
collapsed into themselves. ribs
caving toward the spine. recite
the strongest poem you know. a spell
against the lonely that gets you
in crowds and on three hours’ sleep.
wonder where the gods are now.
get up. because death is not
an alternative. because this is what you do.
air like soup, move. door, hallway, room.
pants, socks, shoes. sweater. coat. cold.
wish you were a bird. remember you
are not you, now. you are you
a year from now. how does that
woman walk? she is not sick or sad.
doesn’t even remember today.
has been to Europe. what song
is she humming? now. right now.
that’s it.

Post from mobile portal m.livejournal.com
 
 
Liane, Klutz Queen of the Galaxy
12 May 2010 @ 08:42 pm

Wow. Just wow.

Finished The Walking Dead Compendium. I can't believe that just happened.

Off to do a tarot reading.
 
 
Mood: surprisedsurprised